Sometime ago, a performance artist, Wura-Natasha, shared a little concern of hers with me about women not really having pastimes.
I said to her that I did not totally agree with her little concern, because I thought women could create pastimes for themselves if they wanted to.
Until lately, I carried on with the feeling that women had their own pastimes even though it may not be as much as the men enjoyed.
I began to have a rethink concerning the ‘seemingly harmless’ issue when a second woman, Ify, raised the same concern. Ify told me she needed to share the thought with me because she wanted to know if she was being un-African or simply unwomanly!
Like Wura-Natasha, Ify said she had observed it even as a growing girl, that her brothers had ‘the grace’ to enjoy watching their favourite game of football laced with endless excitements and arguments, totally about the game.
From the points both women raised at different times, men enjoyed their pastimes discussing issues of personal interests without interferences. But for the women, it is a different ballgame.
Wura-Natasha actually got me to realise that even when women thought they were alone and away from home, they actually ‘stray back’ to the home concerns than just relax among themselves.
For every discussion, they remember something about the children or the husbands. The women can’t relax without remembering that something needs to be fixed at home. They must continually make adjustments to accommodate new plans thrown at them either by the children, the husband or some family member.
After all, I decided to keep ‘A Woman’s Concern’ diary, which I hope to share soon. Everywhere I went the results showed similar patterns and I agreed with Wura-Natasha and Ify on just how difficult or impossible it could be for women to have real